At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
