Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize