I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
