Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
