Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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