But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
