i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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