Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize