I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
