Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
