Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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