So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
