Apparently you make a good broom.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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