biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
