Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
