So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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