I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
