i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
