I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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