theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
