Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
