I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
