I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
you inspire me to be a worse person
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
