Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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