he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
