I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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