Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
