apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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