i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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