theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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