We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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