My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
