First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
