I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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