Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
In America we eat man semen.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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