That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
