She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
