i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
