That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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