How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
