Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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