Nicole vs. Life
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
