i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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