Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
