why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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