the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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