What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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