so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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