i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
