I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
