just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
